It has been a tough month for humanity. All of us were shocked with so many heartbreaking news. Especially about the Christchurch Mosque Shootings. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the victim's families that were affected by this dreadful tragedy. Let us take some time to send our most sincere Al-Fatihah to them. Innalillahhiwainlalilahiroji'un and Al-Fatihah.
This post unfortunately is not about The Christchurch dreadful tragedy but there is an upcoming post dedicated on that topic later on so keep your eyes on this blog if you are looking forward to it. Today's topic is about masculinity. Toxic masculinity to be precise.
What is toxic masculinity? Im not going to put on a long definition because well honestly, who has time for that but let me break it down as simple as I can for you. Toxic masculinity means an exaggerated idea of how a man should act. For example, a male needs to be super strong, unemotional, aggressive, not having to care about skin and so forth. Male who are too emotional or maybe aren’t violent enough or don’t do all of the things that “real men” do, can get their “man card” taken away. Toxic masculinity often happens to guys within the age of teens or pre adult. University students also.
We were shocked with the news of how Johnny Depp was abused by her ex-wife. Im not going to really dig in too deep on that because this is not a gossip blog. However, I am going to touch on a few matters regarding how "Toxic Masculinity" trait is something so huge that it can actually affect one's mental health. Ever since we were little, we were pushed by the society with the idea on how a man "should be". This includes pushing away or hiding feelings one possesses. Suppressing emotions. Those who share their emotions or those who cry are considered as weak or "pondan". Having these toxic traits actually are othe main reason on why men are so afraid in voicing out about being abused.
Being abused by anyone especially a woman doesn't mean that he is weak. Abusers come in all sorts of backgrounds; men, women, educated, non-educated etc. When society pushes this ideology of how a man getting abused by a woman are considered "pondan" or they are so weak that they cannot stand for themselves, we are subconsciously silencing the voice of these men who are being abused. Often guys who told their friends that they had been abused were either laughed at or mocked at. It’s quite a rare case where their friends take their stories seriously. Toxic masculinity in university is something we need to ponder upon. Why has toxic masculinity become a norm in out society? Especially in university. Let the voices of the victims be loud and clear. Never say they are weak for voicing out their stories. Never say they are a “pondan” for not fighting back. You have no idea what goes on behind the curtain. Support your friend. Make them feel like they are not weak for having to go through such depressing situation. Don’t ever make them feel less just because they were abused.
Having this happen and normalize in a society is actually something toxic and we need to put a stop to it. Abuse is still an abuse. No matter who or what gender has been abused, an abuse is still an abuse.
“By far the worst thing we do to males — by making them feel they have to be hard — is that we leave them with very fragile egos.”
— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, award-winning author
This post unfortunately is not about The Christchurch dreadful tragedy but there is an upcoming post dedicated on that topic later on so keep your eyes on this blog if you are looking forward to it. Today's topic is about masculinity. Toxic masculinity to be precise.
What is toxic masculinity? Im not going to put on a long definition because well honestly, who has time for that but let me break it down as simple as I can for you. Toxic masculinity means an exaggerated idea of how a man should act. For example, a male needs to be super strong, unemotional, aggressive, not having to care about skin and so forth. Male who are too emotional or maybe aren’t violent enough or don’t do all of the things that “real men” do, can get their “man card” taken away. Toxic masculinity often happens to guys within the age of teens or pre adult. University students also.
We were shocked with the news of how Johnny Depp was abused by her ex-wife. Im not going to really dig in too deep on that because this is not a gossip blog. However, I am going to touch on a few matters regarding how "Toxic Masculinity" trait is something so huge that it can actually affect one's mental health. Ever since we were little, we were pushed by the society with the idea on how a man "should be". This includes pushing away or hiding feelings one possesses. Suppressing emotions. Those who share their emotions or those who cry are considered as weak or "pondan". Having these toxic traits actually are othe main reason on why men are so afraid in voicing out about being abused.
Being abused by anyone especially a woman doesn't mean that he is weak. Abusers come in all sorts of backgrounds; men, women, educated, non-educated etc. When society pushes this ideology of how a man getting abused by a woman are considered "pondan" or they are so weak that they cannot stand for themselves, we are subconsciously silencing the voice of these men who are being abused. Often guys who told their friends that they had been abused were either laughed at or mocked at. It’s quite a rare case where their friends take their stories seriously. Toxic masculinity in university is something we need to ponder upon. Why has toxic masculinity become a norm in out society? Especially in university. Let the voices of the victims be loud and clear. Never say they are weak for voicing out their stories. Never say they are a “pondan” for not fighting back. You have no idea what goes on behind the curtain. Support your friend. Make them feel like they are not weak for having to go through such depressing situation. Don’t ever make them feel less just because they were abused.
Having this happen and normalize in a society is actually something toxic and we need to put a stop to it. Abuse is still an abuse. No matter who or what gender has been abused, an abuse is still an abuse.
“By far the worst thing we do to males — by making them feel they have to be hard — is that we leave them with very fragile egos.”
— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, award-winning author
P/s: Sorry for any grammar mistakes.
Anonymous - Friday, 22nd March '19
No comments:
Post a Comment